8 People Who Gloriously Got Revenge
Published in People & Blogs at March 30th, 2017 at 9:52 AM
Revenge is a dish best served cold, that's how the saying go. In this way, revenge is much like ice cream. You also shouldn't have too much and sometimes the flavor is enhanced by just a pinch of salt, but most importantly, its truly at its best when it also served gloriously. Here are the tales of 8 people made their revenge most glorious! Tales acts that we'd normally deem pretty bad, but are just so damn cathartic and borderline heroic that we can help but smile when we read about them.
Feel Short Changed by Marriage? No Problem!
Let’s be honest. Pennies are a nuisance. Unless you’re someone who literally collects pennies so you can cash them in for notes, then odds are you get get pretty sick of them weighing down your wallet. Well one woman found the perfect opportunity to rid herself of her sizeable sum of pennies in sliest, saltiest way possible. .When a judge ordered her to pay her former husband around $50 as part of the couple’s divorce settlement, she did the most logical and bitter thing she could, and paid up in pennies
She also left a cutting goodbye letter for her former husband. To add insult to injury, She also included rice and beans, which might have been a stab at her ex-husband’s heritage (yeah, I've got no clue quite as to how exactly either). 'Andy, Here’s forty seven dollars and twelve cents in pennies,' the letter begins, 'The other three dollars paid for the containers that I used. Receipt is included if you want to return them… I hope you have a fab life! B/C I know mine’s 20X better without you in it! Thank you!' Hey in a way it’s a win win, sorta'. The husband get’s his money and she doesn’t have to deal with tubs of pennies anymore.
Dressed to Distress (Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Ruin My Ex's Wedding Dress)
After a divorce, there are probably few mementos of the relationship you want left around: perhaps that one photograph from happier times, the TV you bought, and probably any kids you had. But for guy a leaving a marriage, that last thing you'd expect him to want to keep is her wedding dress. Breaking up after 12 years of marriage, one woman simply forgot to take her wedding dress with her. Her husband tried to let her know, but she refused; ultimately, this was a decision she would come to regret because her former husband had some ideas about what to do with it.
Now, most men would probably want rid of the bad memories, but this guy decided he had better ideas. So what did he do? He, along with the help of his family and friends, created a list of over 101 different ways in which his ex-wife’s wedding dress could still be used; ranging from dental floss, to picnic blanket, and even as a makeshift Slip’N’Slide. The success of his blog and the pictures were somuch so that he was able to turn the entire list into a book. So, while his now ex-wife may just be bitter memories in the past, at least she left him with a means to fame.
The Law of my Domain
Speeding tickets suck. No one wants one. Admittedly, they are meant to enforce the speed limit and thus help prevent severe traffic accidents, but still, no one wants one. Its bad enough if you get pulled over and written a ticket by an officer in person, but at least that has a human an personal touch; what is worse is when its all left to a machine. Most motorists will probably agree that speed cameras suck. And unlike a police officer, they lack human discretion. If you were 1 mile over the limit, a police officer may let you off (its only 1mph more than it should be), but a speed camera don't care; 1 measly mile over is a fine. Whats worse, is you don't find out until way later through the post. One motorist called McCrary found a $90 fine for speeding in his mail one morning. He obviously took umbrage at having been screwed over by a machine, because went on a sneaky revenge scheme against the police department who fined him.
When McCrary went onto the Bluff City Police Department website (his local police department responsible for the ticket, of course) to schedule his hearing for speeding, he was greeted with a notice. The notice was directed at the police department itself and was a reminder that their licence on the site's domain name was about to expire.This gave McCrary a fiendish idea. He waited a couple of days longer until Bluff City Police Department's hold on the domain expired and bought it for himself. 'I really thought for sure that the city would renew it,' said McCrary, who lives in Gray, Tennessee. 'I was surprised to find that it was still out there.'
Obviously, the Police Department were all too happy about this, but there was nothing they could do. What did McCrary do with the domain? He vented his frustration with the speed cameras in the most heroically promethean way he could; he turned BluffCityPD.com into a website dedicated to exposing all speed camera sites in the city, an related news and ways to beat them. You can't help applausde this smartarsed but craft act of revenge.
Rocka-bye Baby...
This here is the romantic story of a Canadian mayor giving his wife the gift she always wanted.... only she really wanted it. Wanted it to the point it was all she would talk about. Sometimes ladies just want to be spoiled a little and be bought a big ol' rock the can show off to all their friends. In this tale, one woman got just that, like she had always wanted.... Love and affection were not good enough for Isa Larivière (now Prévost), and she had always wanted to be spoiled in just such a way by her husband Dany Larivière; a problem with this arose in that the couple divorced, which you might think would put things on hold.
Divorce cost Dany Larivière, the mayor of Saint-Théodore-d’Acton, (east of Montreal) a whole lotta' dolla', and needless to say he wasn't too happy about it. The custody battle for his children has been especially hard on him, and he bled a lot of money into getting joint custody. To make things worse, his now ex-wife had been harassing him the whole time. Eventually, he gave into feelings of retribution and had a 20 ton boulder dumped on her lawn.
Technically, it was birthday present to his ex-wife, not an act of revenge, as it had 'Happy Birthday Isa, XX' sprayed across it. Dare say it was bit of white elephant though (especially as it weighed as much as three) delivered with a certain glorious passive aggressiveness that is somehow satisfying to read about. When asked about his choice in birthday present, Larivière quipped that, 'It’s a gift. It’s hers now.' He further added that, 'I (Larivière) did it in the middle of the night. It was a surprise.' Quite the surprise I'm sure. Be careful what you wish for ladies, especially if you go asking about having a big rock to show off.
Coupe du Petit Jean
Guys reading this, I warm you now that the following might make you cross your legs and wince. Continue reading however, as there is a lesson in what follows somewhere. This story has a certain infamy to it and you'll surely see why in a moment. So men simply cringe at the utterance of the name 'Lorena Bobbitt', and you won't be likely to forget it afterwards. Lorena Bobbitt's revenge was perhaps well deserved given she was married to an absolute dickhead of a husband; that's not an understatement, though for reasons you'll soon discover, he was literally a bit less of a one afterwards. John Wayne Bobbitt abused his wife something terrible. Not only that, he cheated on her and flaunted it. He was also apparently a selfish lover who treated orgasms like reverse Christmas presents (that is to say he preferred to receive them, rather than to give). Her revenge? Well prepare thy-selves gents, cos' back in 1993, a snapped Lorena cut her husband's penis off.
Yeouwch! At least this fella' probably had it coming anyway, but it still hurts to think about regardless. Needless to say, despite her violent outburst, many support groups rallied around Lorena afterwards. The case brought domestic abuse and violence back into public attention and of course the couple divorced there after. There was even one super awkward appearance on the Oprah show years later in 2009.
Lorena when on to work in a hair salon and is the reason Bobbittize is now a word in the medical dicktionary. John apparently never learned his lesson. Continued to be a misogynist asshat once his member was reattached, flaunting his freedom and a recently single man. He even tried to make it as a pornstar with his gimmick being that he once had his willy removed, so naturally he named his porno 'John Wayne Bobbitt: Uncut'. It takes a ballsy man to try and make a career out of loosing your penis, and it actually worked for him for a time; but not wanting to give him too much credit, because he was still a total turd. There is perhaps some catharsis in all this knowing that after his brief taste of dickless fame, this abuser was arrested several times later on for theft, probation violation, and not at all surprisingly, assault and battery committed against his second wife. Some people never change. (and to save you the trouble, having seen some of the court case pictures, he had no more than a discount store pig in a blanket in his pants)
Taking a Byte Out of Crime
Hackers have a pretty big impact on today's society. There have been so many stories of mass hacks revealing secret information from large conglomerates, to simple account hacks on Facebook. Needless to say, Hackers have a lot of power in what is now seen as a mostly digital world. So you could imagine stealing from a hacker wouldn’t end well right?
Mark Bao is a computer software entrepreneur who’s been a major computer whiz since elementary school. In the fifth grade, he created an app that would help his fellow classmates manage homework and sold it on floppy disks for $5 each. So, long story short, Bao most definitely knows his way around a computer. So, it probably was a pretty bad day for him when he found out that his laptop had been stolen.
You'd think Bao would be having a bad time of it, but no; this bright young hacker took beautiful revenge on the thief. Bao was able to hack into his stolen laptop’remotely and upon checking through the files on the hard drive, he found a thing of beauty; an video of the thief dancing. So, what does Mark Bao do? He uploads it to Youtube of course. Immediately the thief comes back and returns the laptop to campus police, begging Bao to remove the video. Seems like a lighter sentence than jail time, so really, the thief got off lucky. That video stands at around 2 million views at last check, so and its unlikely its coming down anytime soon (its the internet's now, so there are probably several dozen meme remixes of it already).
Star Wars Episode VIII: Revenge of the Production Company
Acting with passion and being ruled by your emotions is apparently a very Sith thing to do, but sometimes, even the strongest of Jedi given in to revenge. Anakin and Luke Skywalker both tread that path to the darkside; and apparently so did Star War creator George Lucas. That said, as act of revenge go, its hard to think it was somewhat well deserved, and is actually pretty clever. You see, revenge is quite possibly at its best also has some form of positive impact. This tale of revenge begins like so; after the first Star Wars film was released and was a massive hit, Lucas decided he wanted to take his production company away from the hustle and bustle of Hollywood. He opted to move it to Marin county in California, which is one of the wealthiest counties in the United States.
Being that the area is filled with wealthy folk, most of the community enjoyed the privacy and exclusivity of the area. Lucas was more than happy to not interfere with this; he had chosen the location precisely for the expectation of privacy. He spent millions of dollars on the move and expansion, but he encountered backlash from the Marin community. Their complaint? Well, the local residents expected that Lucasfilm's presence would attract a large number of lower-income workers to the area seeking residency. Most communities are normally thankful new job opportunities and business enterprises, but not Marin. No, the people of Marin were all well rich folk and wanted it to stay that way. They didn't want their exclusivity and good reputation damaged by Lucas.
Lucas gave into the pressure and sold off the land in Marin that was bought for the film company's future development. In emotional statement posted online, Lucasfilm declared that it had always meant to be a a 'creative asset' to Marin, 'not an an evil empire.' Of course, Lucas was not letting the stingy snobs who'd shunned him and his company off easy. Yes, he sold the land and abandoned the project, but it was to who he sold it to where is vengeance comes to fruition. To who? Like a bitter Robin Hood, Lucas sold the land to a developer of build low-income housing. Obviously this angered the residents of Marin, cried fear of 'gangs, drug dealers, and low life scum' being brought to their affluent community. So there you have it, Marin CA, never will you find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. (oh, I am of course referring to the miserly so and so who called the place home before Lucas turned up.
Charlie Wilson's War (With His Neighbour)
Charlie Wilson was one of America’s greatest politicians of recent times. While that is probably subject to opinion, its hard to deny he left an impact on the World. His messing with the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan was all kinds of clever and sneaky, and really screwed over the USSR. Goooo Capitalism! The story was worth a damn good Tom Hanks movie, so you know Charlie Wilson must have been a pretty solid guy. But movie worthy exploits aside, few people know how he sttarted his career in politics. Turns out, its a clever revenge story.
Wilson started quite young in politics, far enough back that he was still a fairly innocent boy with a beloved dog. According to Wilson himself, he first entered politics as a teenager by running a campaign against his next-door neighbour, city council incumbent Charles Hazard. When Wilson was still just thirteen years old, Wilson’s ageing dog entered Hazard’s yard. Harzard wasn't too happy about the pooch's incursion onto his property and retaliated by mixing crushed glass into the dog’s food; this causing fatal internal bleeding. Cruel bastard right? Wickedness like that thankfully didn't go unpunished and Wilson set out on revenge. Following this incident, Wilson obtained a driver’s permit and drove ninety-six voters, to the polls in his family’s two-door Chevrolet.
As the would-be voters left the car, Wilson, being a polite fellow, told each of them that he didn’t want to influence their vote, but that the Charles Hazard had purposely, and maliciously, killed his dog. After the votes were all tallied up, it turned out that Hazzard had been dethrones from his position by a mere 16 votes. Afterwards, Wilson went to Hazrad's house to tell him he shouldn’t go about poisoning any more dogs. Wilson cited this as “the day I fell in love with America.” It’s always good to see justice play out where it’s well deserved.
